Everyone yearns for lasting love, yet it often seems elusive. Why is it so hard to find and then, if you do, why is it so darn hard to keep? As a couple’s therapist and life coach, I have worked with couples and singles for years with relationship struggles, fears, blocks and traumas.
Most of the people I talk with have no idea how to choose a healthy partner and create a loving relationship. I have had several young clients tell me they have no idea what a good relationship looks or feels like because they have never seen one. When I first heard this, I was a bit shocked. But once I heard it multiple times, it sunk in that healthy, lasting, conscious relationships are a rare thing indeed.
We live in a culture that does not teach relationship skills. Why is this not learned in school if not at home? Most people seem at a loss as how to proceed and, after a few failed attempts, often avoid the whole issue altogether.
I recently read the book, It’s Never Too Late for Love by a friend and colleague, Pat Burns. In this beautiful book, Pat and her husband Larry describe their path to meeting and falling in love later in life. Both had previous marriages that did not work out and they individually moved to Maui to enjoy their golden years.
Pat describes how she distinctly desired to meet her soulmate when she chose to move to Maui at age 65. She left four children and six grandchildren behind in Rhode Island to pursue her dreams. Her faith in herself and in Spirit gave her the strength to face and overcome the usual obstacles related to moving to a brand new community and building a new life.
Pat faced these challenges with an open heart and met Larry early on in her life on Maui. They developed a beautiful friendship for a few years that later blossomed into a deep love that led to marriage.
What is so special about this book and their story is not just the magical nature of the adventure to move to Maui and find a soulmate, but the depth and quality of the love they actually created.
This book is written from both Pat and Larry’s point of view. They alternate in describing their own experiences with the challenges they faced in their relationship and the unique ways they dealt with them. They have clearly both been committed to their own personal growth over the years, have done the hard work of healing their pasts and learned to take self responsibility.
By vulnerably sharing their story and giving the reader a bird’s eye view into their day-to-day workings, they are modeling what a truly loving, conscious relationship can look like. It may not always be easy to choose to be loving, kind and forgiving when things aren’t going your way, but the authors demonstrate the great rewards of doing so.
If you or someone you know is struggling with believing in love, finding love, and keeping love, I highly recommend this book. It provides a sense of hope and peace for those who may feel lasting love has pasted them by. Pat and Larry show that it is not too late and that the best may be yet to come.
Pat and Larry may be reached at www.simplyawomanoffaith.com.