Everyone yearns for lasting love, yet it often seems elusive. Why is it so hard to find and then, if you do, why is it so darn hard to keep? As a couple’s therapist and life coach, I have worked with couples and singles for years with relationship struggles, fears, blocks and traumas.

Most of the people I talk with have no idea how to choose a healthy partner and create a loving relationship. I have had several young clients tell me they have no idea what a good relationship looks or feels like because they have never seen one. When I first heard this, I was a bit shocked. But once I heard it multiple times, it sunk in that healthy, lasting, conscious relationships are a rare thing indeed.

We live in a culture that does not teach relationship skills. Why is this not learned in school if not at home? Most people seem at a loss as how to proceed and, after a few failed attempts, often avoid the whole issue altogether.

I recently read the book, It’s Never Too Late for Love by a friend and colleague, Pat Burns. In this beautiful book, Pat and her husband Larry describe their path to meeting and falling in love later in life. Both had previous marriages that did not work out and they individually moved to Maui to enjoy their golden years.