One of the most common phrases I hear people say when we discuss steps to change their life is, “That’s hard…!”
I often respond by saying, “What you are doing now is hard!”
Yeah, sorry…growth is often hard. That’s the truth. I won’t sugar coat it or lie…
I won’t waste your time or money promising quick fixes and easy solutions to most of life’s challenges and problems.
I’ve been around long enough to know there are no quick fixes and no real shortcuts to sustained growth and transformation.
I don’t do bandaid therapy or superficial life coaching. I haven’t found it to work. What works is the true grit of deep self-determination, self-confrontation and the courage to do what it takes to move through blocks and fears.
I have seen people work miracles in their lives when they stick with it. It is often my most down and out client who surprises me the most with the transformation they make. People amaze me. You never know what guts they have.
One example is the client who came to me after a marital separation in her late 50’s. She hadn’t worked for 15 years and was looking for employment in Denver. Despite a good education and graduate degree, no one was hiring her.
After another disheartening week of no job interviews, I said, “We have to figure out a way for you to become self-employed. What do you like to do the most? What are you good at? What is your passion?”
She paused for a moment and replied, “I like cooking Sunday dinner for my family.”
I said, “OK, then, we need to figure out some way you can make money with those skills.”
This women has now created a product, business and company that is on the verge of sky-rocketing into the national arena.
Was it easy? Hell, no….
We did sessions twice per week for months. She worked her butt off. She utilized every skill, tool, meditation practice, thought-stopping process and brain re-wiring technique we discussed.
She got out in the community, met people, networked, took on needed training and enlisted her adult kids to help her with her budding business.
She challenged me with relentless questions, frequently dumped her anger and fear on me and gave me a run for my money. Big time. I held the space when she wanted to collapse in fear, anger and desperation.
I believed in her 100%. I could see her potential. I was being guided by a force beyond me to hold her through this.
She went from extreme fear, desperation and hopelessness to living life on her terms. She still works very hard, but is thriving and bringing her talents into the world. She has changed her future from dismal to one filled with creativity, optimism and prosperity. She has even reunited with her estranged husband.
I watch people grow and transform all the time. I work on it in my own life, too. Does it feel good?
Not exactly. What does it feel like?
It feels like skating on the edge of fear…constantly. It feels like dancing with the devil and confronting all your demons at once. It feels like you never quite reach your final destination, and if you did, things could fall apart at any moment…
But, hey, that’s life.
If you want to be alive and maximize your greatest potential your job is to remove the blocks that are keeping you stuck. Then move forward one tiny step at a time. Repeat this process again and again…It never really stops.
It can be tedious…far from glamorous.
We all know the people who have closed shop and turned their lights off. Just walk down any street or visit your closest shopping mall and look into the eyes of the people. Really look. Are they alive or coasting in the safety zone?
I get it when people say, “Enough. I’m done…!”
Life can be brutal. But, it can also be beautiful.
It’s your choice.
Most people who choose a life coach want more from life than safety. They want to maximize their soul’s potential. They want to complete their hero’s journey and feel they made a difference in the world.
They feel the urge to grow, to evolve. They just don’t know how to do it. They need one other person to believe in them when they can’t or don’t believe in their own ability.
This year is coming to a close. How was 2018 for you? What is 2019 going to be about for you? Is it time to commit to yourself? What have you been putting off? How much longer can you delay, avoid and numb out?
Life awaits you. You can do it. I believe in you. I have seen miracles. Become one. For you and for me. For all of us…We need you. Now more than ever…